If you don't already know I am pursuing a Master Degree in Elementary Education. While I am earning the degree I also need to work because my bills don't give a good got-damn what I'm doing as long as they get their money. So being a substitute teacher is a good job for me because A) it pays and B) I get some first hand classroom experience. (Side Note - If your company is hiring, hook me up! Please!)
So anyhow, while serving as a "sub" I have noticed that the children in these schools tend to say similar things. These things seem to start around the third grade and become more prevalent the closer they get to middle school age. I should also note that these schools that I've been to are not the upper echelon of public schools in the city. They have been underperforming schools and these Top 10 Quotes are a reflection of that.
A Note About The Teachers
Before I go into the Top 10 list, it should be noted that DC Public Schools have been underperforming for many years. The new Chancellor seems to be trying her best to shake things up in DC, for the benefit of the students she would say, but time will tell how effective her moves really are. She has had quite a few mis-steps, and the media has wanted to laud her before she has really proven what she can do. It's like that "can't miss" #1 draft pick; it's all good until it's not all good.
I have noticed that many of the teachers seem to want to do well. But the teachers in these schools are facing a lot of challenges. Poor funding, inadequate buildings, lack of parental involvement, and a number of other issues have to be dealt with by these teachers. Believe me folks, it is not a walk in the park for them. Well with that said, let's get on to the list.
Top 10 List
I was wondering how I should order the list 10 to 1 or 1 to 10. And should I do it by my favorite quotes, or by what I hear most often. So I decided to go from 10 to 1, but with no particular significance to it's order (for instance #5 isn't necessarily any more significant than #9). If you are a parent, you may note that you probably hear some of these same things around the house from your kids. So, if you hear it around the house, you better believe they are saying it in school. So without further ado...
10. "What Did I Do?"
You would usually hear this one after you single out a student for doing something that he/she should not have been doing. Somehow students NEVER seem to know that they did something wrong, even though you were looking right at them as they did it. And if this wasn't enough, you some times will get...
9. "It Wasn't Me!"
Uhhhm, yeah, it was you. I was looking right at you throw the paper, I know your voice, or your fellow classmates ratted you out. If you as a teacher had your attention diverted from whatever reason, then there is the possibility that it may not have been that student, so what, they will do something else later.
8. "So, I'm Not Going"
Usually said under their breath, in a low tone (but not low enough) after you threaten them with detention. The common sound effect that accompanies this is the sucking of teeth. The normal teacher follow-up threat will tend to involve either the Principle (or Vice Principle or Dean of Students, etc) or parents, to which the student will typically respond with...
7. "But I Didn't Do Anything"
Refer to #'s 10 and 9. By this point hopefully the student will just leave well enough alone. But there are way to many students who can't or don't know when to stop, and their next response is usually...
6. "So, I Don't Care"
If I were somehow rating these quotes, this would be pretty high up on the list. This response is a big deal when I hear it because you hear it too many times. I am not sure if the student really doesn't care or if it is just a defensive response from them. If I were to go on how the students continue to act, I would say they really don't care.
As a substitute teacher you know going in that the children will expect to have a day off since you are there. Some teachers are fully prepared for their absence and leave plenty of relevant work for the students to do. Many however leave some simple busy work that far too often the students tell me they've already done the worksheet before, and they finish in 10 minutes. Therefore depending on the age and class, how they occupy the rest of their time is always interesting.
I had a class of 5th grade boys that was just off the hook. They couldn't stay still for 30 seconds. Constantly talking, pushing, throwing paper at each other, wanting to do wrestling moves on each other, talking about each other derogatively, and definitely not wanting to do their work, it was crazy. I typically let students talk to each other as long as they don't get out of hand. Well as I described earlier "out of hand" seemed to be the norm for them. I yelled at them, and it go their attention, for about 45 seconds. Send a kid to the office, he'd come back, and 5 minutes later he was back to doing things that would get him in trouble. They just didn't seem to care.
It is a shame when that is the case because they don't understand how important learning and education is to their lives. Which brings me to the next quote...
5. "I Can't Do This"
There is absolutely nothing wrong with not being able to do a problem. That is why you go to school, to learn it. But (you knew there was a "but" coming didn't you?!?) in this case the students are NOT asking "how do you do this?" or "can you help me do this?" The problem I have with this quote is when the children barely try to do the work. I think it is because some are just intellectually lazy, and too much is given to them. They would definitely rather copy someone else's paper than actually try to do he work themselves. At the first sign of difficulty, they retreat and are ready to give up. Fortunately, with a little bit of instruction and encouragement, you can help a good number of students through this one, but far too many still believe that they "can't".
4. "Why Do We Have To Do This Anyway?"
I hear this one a lot. It would be okay if it was 12th grade Trigonometry, but is is usually basic math or reading work assignments. I try to answer this by engaging them in a conversation about what they want to be when they grow up. No matter what it is the students want to be, they don't seem to get it that you need to know how to add, subtract, multiply, divide, and/or read. It's somewhat okay when you are a fourth grader and you want to be a wrestler and you don't make the immediate connection, but it is far less okay when you are an 8th grader who says you want to be a veterinarian and you are failing basic science and math.
3. "Mr/Mrs X Is Boring"
Not much I can say about that. If the teacher is boring, then they are boring. There are far too many teachers who don't make their classes even remotely exciting. This could be because of the pressure that teachers are under to "teach to the test". Ah yes, "the test". Every state has their measurement tests, and teachers feel the pressure to have their students performing at least "at standard". Well if you account for all of the issues that I mentioned earlier in the post, it is pretty hard to get the underperforming students to be "at standard". So, who has time for fun? The classroom surely isn't the place to have it, right?
2. "Can I Go Get Some Water" or "Can I Go To The Bathroom"
Man do I get that one a lot! Many teachers have set times to allow their students bathroom and water breaks and when I mention it to the children, they act like it is the first time they ever heard such a thing! Bathroom and water breaks are run of the mill time wasters- go to the bathroom, that's less time in the class, and more time in the hall baby! Nothing is going on in the hall, but children love to be there!
1. "This Is Such An Un-Learning Environment!"
This is my favorite quote. It was said one day by an eighth grade student who was clearly disgusted by his classroom. This student was (is) going on to one of the top high schools in DC, and for him to be in the school he was currently in was probably torture. I will reiterate that I believe that most teachers want to do a good job and would love to be surrounded by students who just loved to learn. But that certainly isnt the case in many instances.
Right, wrong, or whatever, as a substitute teacher I think I get to have a pretty good view of some things. I'm not attached to the school(s) that I come in to sub for, so I don't have any allegiances, and I don't have any baggage either. So when I see something, it is me seeing it as an outsider who has been let in for a little while. I see poorly lit classes, bland colors on the walls, messy rooms, posters on walls that I know the kids don't pay attention to, kids with poor attitudes, parents who barely participate in their child's education process, and poor/bad attitudes (towards themselves, teachers, classmates, and learning), and frustrated teachers...yup, definitely an "unlearning environment".
I don't want to make it seem like these schools are "Eastside High" (see the movie Lean On Me starring Morgan Freeman), but they will need a similar type of turn around, with focused efforts by EVERYBODY, especially the parents, because I do beleive it starts at home.
Please share your thoughts, comments, questions, and job offers below!
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